In the days and weeks following a high-profile tragedy such as the
Newtown, Connecticut school shootings or the Moore, Oklahoma tornado leveling schools and neighborhoods , kids may have a lot of questions
about whether something like this could happen to them. In fact,
parents themselves may have a lot of worries about the safety of raising
children in this world. It's normal for both adults and kids to feel
anxious after such a publicly devastating event, but there are things
you can do to minimize the stress and maintain a sense of normalcy.
Here are some tips from psychologists.
It's Normal to Be Concerned. Youngsters who have
heard or seen news reports about disturbing events may be reluctant to
return to the classroom and other public spaces. Moms and dads may even
feel anxious about dropping their kids off at day care or school, after
hearing about tragedies that happen to children. "Parents are following
instincts to be alarmed and to be fearful," says nationally certified
school psychologist Eric Rossen, Ph.D. But Rossen stresses that we need
to remember these are isolated incidents. "It's important to continue to
remember that this is such a rare event, statistically and objectively
speaking. It's hard to bear because it's so rare."
Take a News Break. While you may be interested in
watching twenty-four-hour news for all the latest developments, your
children may not be able to handle that. The American Psychological
Association recommends limiting the amount of time spent watching news
reports, as constant exposure may actually heighten their anxiety and
fears.
Answer Kids' Questions – Without Giving Them Unnecessary Details.
Even if you limit news exposure in your home, chances are your kids may
hear details—accurate or not—on the playground. When they return to
school after a national tragedy, it's a good idea to ask what they've
heard.
"A lot of times, children misunderstand what's happening," says
Eileen Kennedy-Moore, Ph.D., author of "Smart Parenting for Smart Kids.”
"For example, if they saw a picture of men carrying guns, it looked
like there was a lot of them. Let them know the gunman is not in our
backyard. This is not something that's happening at many different
schools."
And if kids have questions, Rossen says the key is to answer—not
avoid—them without giving too much information. As parents we must remember, we do not need to provide the graphic details nor share the images. Answer the question and support your child by reassuring them that tragedies and natural disasters of this magnitude are rare. At which point, you can discuss your "family plan" for emergencies and turn the tragedy into a pro-active family activity by including your children.
Maintain a Regular Schedule. While it may be
tempting to keep your kids close to your side after a devastating event,
child psychologists agree that sticking to a regular routine helps kids
to get past their distress. "By bringing our children to school, we are
communicating a very important message about courage and resilience,
about going on despite terrible things that happen," says Kennedy-Moore.
For preschoolers, talk them through their day using very concrete
examples, such as, "You're going to be with Mrs. Smith, and she's going
to be in charge of you. Daddy's going to get back at lunch, and we'll go
to the playground."
Pay Extra Attention to Your Kids. When you are at
home with your children, make sure to be engaged with them. The National
Association of School Psychologists recommends that parents focus on
their children during the week following a tragedy, including spending
some extra time reading or playing with kids before bed, to foster a
sense of closeness and security.
Model Confidence and Assurance. Don't forget that
you are your child's role model during times of stress. Kennedy-Moore
explains, "Children look to their parents to see how scared they should
be." Of course, if you are feeling anxious, make time to address your
own needs, such as talking to friends or family or seeking guidance from
religious leaders or counselors.
Find Solace or Take Action. Even children can feel
better by doing something, whether it's a spiritual pursuit, a political
activity or just an act of kindness. Look for activities that are
age-appropriate. "Find a child-sized way to take action," says
Kennedy-Moore, "saying a prayer together, or raising money, or signing a
petition, or sending a card or letter."
Signs of More Than Normal Stress. Watch for signs of
excessive fear or anxiety in the next few weeks. According to the
American Psychological Association, signs of stress in children can
include trouble sleeping, difficulty concentrating on school work, or
changes in appetite. If those symptoms last for more than a week or two,
ask your child's teachers if they are observing the same thing and
consult your school psychologist or pediatrician.
Focus on the Positive. Experts, from psychologists
to religious leaders, remind us to focus on the good. For starters,
remember how unusual these tragedies are. "Statistically speaking, it's
safer for them to be in a school than for a parent to put them in a
car," says Rossen.
Tough times can be a reminder for us to cherish our family and loved
ones each day. Kennedy-Moore reminds us, "There is more joy than sorrow
in life."
Writtenby Grace Hwang Lynch: writer, consultant, and mom based in the San
Francisco Bay Area. She blogs about Asian fusion family and food at
HapaMama.com
Edited by Anthony Gonzalez for Child Quest International
Child Quest International (CQI) Blog focused on abduction prevention, missing & exploited children, and resources to help protect kids of all ages. If you need assistance with a missing child, please email us at info@childquest.org for assistance. Our services are FREE to searching families and law enforcement.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Monday, May 20, 2013
New Partnership Will 'Bring Child Safety To A New Level Of Awareness'
On National Missing Children's Day, recognized nationally every May 25th, parents, guardians, caregivers, and others concerned with the well-being of children are reminded to make child safety a priority and to encourage the public to sustain initiatives and efforts to reunite missing children with their families. It is the day when we honor the outstanding efforts of law enforcement personnel and private citizens who have made a difference in recovering abducted children and protecting children from exploitation.
It is also a day to take action to ensure your child’s safety and family’s well-being. In support of this ongoing endeavor we all share in, Child Quest International is proud to announce our partnership with If I Go Missing to bring child safety to a new level of awareness. This alliance brings the amazing resources of Child Quest International (CQI) together with the security of If I Go Missing (IIGM), forging a team that will make a difference.
At CQI, we pride ourselves on “Keeping Hope Alive” for all missing children and the left-behind families. We work diligently with both families and law enforcement alike to locate missing children using various investigation techniques focused on information dissemination and case management. Our services are free, and have contributed to over 3000 recoveries.
Through our partnership with IIGM, CQI will continue to be able to provide industry leading services for free to searching families and law enforcement.
What is IIGM?
IfIGoMissing.com is a proactive approach to protecting loved ones, providing users with a secure interface to store important identification and technological information. Once a missing person report is filed, the information gets transmitted to the police immediately.
“We are convinced that through education, awareness and use of the most high tech tools available, the chances of facing this type of tragedy can be almost completely eliminated. Peace of mind for your family and loved ones is priceless, but it does require your involvement,” according to Jeremy Reynolds, CEO IIGM.
With prevention and safety education being one of our main priorities at CQI, we believe we can really make things happen and teach families the importance of being proactive through this joint effort.
While nothing will ever replace open communications and teaching your child what to do in dangerous situations, no one can predict or prevent all possibilities of a potential abduction or other emergencies.
Now, if you’re anything like us, you’re probably asking yourself what sets IIGM apart from other online data storage vaults?
Why IIGM?
Firstly, IIGM is specifically engineered towards missing people. That means the fields are laid out for you. Many online vaults are simply places to store things. IIGM has a prepared template telling users what the important info is in the event of a missing persons emergency. Each field is labeled and has an explanation as to why it is important. This is not a simple storage vault. There are free text areas and areas to attach supplemental data. Also, the info is stored in a Tier 1 data center. Very secure.
Secondly, there are “social insurance” policies involved in the event of a missing persons emergency. IIGM will provide PI assistance, Media assistance, and counseling assistance in the event of a missing persons emergency.
Thirdly, because it is specifically engineered towards missing people, there are “reporters.” Reporters are appointed by you, the user, and are able to file a missing persons report on your behalf. The account holder can identify up to 4 reporters. Normal online vaults do no good if the whole family goes missing, or if the kids are at the grandparents’ house while the parents are on a cruise and unreachable. The reporters have no access to the information, but can initiate a transfer to the police nonetheless.
Finally, IIGM provides the transfer of info to the police. That means the parents don’t have to run home to their computer to get the info stored on their computer and print everything out. Once a missing persons report is filed with IIGM, we contact the police and transmit the data.
While that is a lot of tech talk, the point is very important. IIGM is more than a simple online storage server. It is a potential lifeline that goes above and beyond to ensure your family’s safety.
In support of Missing Children’s Day and CQI, IIGM has discounted their premium protection plan (33% OFF for limited time) AND will donate 25% of your purchase price to CQI recovery efforts and education programs.
###
Did you know CQI staff is available to make presentations in the Silicon Valley (CA)? Our subject matter experts will present to schools, parent groups, companies, civic and non-profit groups, profession and faith-based organizations about Online and Personal Safety. Contact us at info@childquest.org with the subject line “PRESENTATION"
Labels:
child safety,
family safety,
Fundraiser,
If I Go Missing,
IIGM,
missing children,
missing children's day,
Online Storage,
vaults
SJPD has arrested a teacher for attempting lewd acts with a minor
![]() |
| Suspect Grant Blair |
San Jose, CA: The San Jose Police Department's Internet Crimes
Against Children (ICAC) task force arrested 41 year old Cupertino Resident Grant
Blair for illegally meeting a minor to engage in lewd or lascivious behavior
(California Penal Code Section 288.4 - Felony).
The suspect, who teaches 4th and 5th grade at Old Orchard School in the City of Campbell, contacted what he believed to be a minor on the internet and agreed to meet for sexual activity. The "minor" was in fact a police officer posing as a 13 year old juvenile. When the suspect arrived at the predetermined time and location, a park in San Jose, officers took him into custody without incident. The suspect was booked into the Santa Clara County Main Jail.
As a precaution, Campbell Police Department detectives interviewed approximately 35 students at Old Orchard School who had prior contact with the suspect to ensure that there were no unreported incidents of lewd or inappropriate conduct. Old Orchard School administration has cooperated with the investigation and no prior incidents were uncovered. The suspect has been employed by the school for approximately one year. The investigation into his previous employment is underway to ensure that there are no victims elsewhere.
"This case shows why ICAC is so valuable to our community," said Acting Police Chief Larry Esquivel. "Their job is finding and arresting child predators and, thankfully, they're really good at what they do."
Persons with information regarding this incident are urged to contact Detective Sean Pierce in the San Jose Police Department's ICAC (Sexual Assaults) Unit at (408)537-1381. Persons wishing to provide information anonymously may call Silicon Valley Crimestoppers at (408)947-STOP (7867) or may visit www.tipsubmit.org and may be eligible for a reward.
Did you know CQI staff is available to make presentations in the Silicon Valley (CA)? Our subject matter experts will present to schools, parent groups, companies, civic and non-profit groups, profession and faith-based organizations about Online and Personal Safety. Contact us at info@childquest.org with the subject line “PRESENTATION"
Source http://www.sjpd.org/inews/viewPressRelease.asp?ID=1426
Edited by Anthony Gonzalez for Child Quest International
The suspect, who teaches 4th and 5th grade at Old Orchard School in the City of Campbell, contacted what he believed to be a minor on the internet and agreed to meet for sexual activity. The "minor" was in fact a police officer posing as a 13 year old juvenile. When the suspect arrived at the predetermined time and location, a park in San Jose, officers took him into custody without incident. The suspect was booked into the Santa Clara County Main Jail.
As a precaution, Campbell Police Department detectives interviewed approximately 35 students at Old Orchard School who had prior contact with the suspect to ensure that there were no unreported incidents of lewd or inappropriate conduct. Old Orchard School administration has cooperated with the investigation and no prior incidents were uncovered. The suspect has been employed by the school for approximately one year. The investigation into his previous employment is underway to ensure that there are no victims elsewhere.
"This case shows why ICAC is so valuable to our community," said Acting Police Chief Larry Esquivel. "Their job is finding and arresting child predators and, thankfully, they're really good at what they do."
Persons with information regarding this incident are urged to contact Detective Sean Pierce in the San Jose Police Department's ICAC (Sexual Assaults) Unit at (408)537-1381. Persons wishing to provide information anonymously may call Silicon Valley Crimestoppers at (408)947-STOP (7867) or may visit www.tipsubmit.org and may be eligible for a reward.
Did you know CQI staff is available to make presentations in the Silicon Valley (CA)? Our subject matter experts will present to schools, parent groups, companies, civic and non-profit groups, profession and faith-based organizations about Online and Personal Safety. Contact us at info@childquest.org with the subject line “PRESENTATION"
Source http://www.sjpd.org/inews/viewPressRelease.asp?ID=1426
Edited by Anthony Gonzalez for Child Quest International
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Cyberbullying & Protecting Your Child
In December 2012, almost everyone with an internet connection learned about the tragic suicide of a 16-year-old girl in Florida. Many attribute her suicide as the result of cyberbullying, and rightly so. On a social media site, anonymous posters had called the girl names and suggested she should die, according to media reports. Due to a number of other similar cases, most states are considering adding cyberbullying laws to their already existing anti-bullying laws.
What is Cyberbullying?
Cyberbullying is defined
as using an electronic device or social media platform to harass another
person. It commonly involves revealing intimate, personal information and/or
images.
Legal Responses to
Cyberbullying
The laws require schools
to take disciplinary action against students who use electronic communication
of any kind to bully other students. The policy applies even when the alleged
bullying takes place away from school and not during school hours. Although
many parents support the laws, some are concerned that such laws infringe on
the First Amendment right to free speech.
Anti-cyberbullying
laws: When in school, students must
follow the school rules. When away from school, students have the same right to
free speech as anyone else. If social media is being used for name calling and
other forms of harassment, the harassed person can take measures not to see the
comments, according to some points
of view. School administrators may have a tendency to overact, even
confusing humor with what some might perceive as an insult, according to research
by CSMonitor.com.
Pro-cyberbullying laws: Some say laws are needed in order to maintain schools
as places of learning. The off-campus bullying spills into the school setting,
making it a hostile environment. Schools have a responsibility to maintain the
well-being of the students by becoming involved in bullying even if that bullying
does not occur at school, according
to supporters of Cyberbullying laws. Cyberbullying laws must be
constructed in order to distinguish it from teenage drama, conflict or just
plain rude behavior.
Emotional Damage
According to the
Cyberbullying Research Center, teenagers particularly suffer severe emotional
problems when they are the target of insults and when others reveal intimate
information about them. Depression is common, coupled with low self-esteem.
Suicide can be the ultimate effect.
Parents are Responding
More than 88 percent of
young people report having at least observed cyberbullying on social network
sites. Parents are responding to this in different ways. Some parents may not
be doing enough to prevent it, while others may be going to extremes.
No matter how much adults
try to protect children from this, it is almost impossible to do so. The most
successful prevention and intervention is to communicate these issues and
stories which highlight the real life, long term effects of online activity. Children
have unlimited access to the Internet and TV programming (which helps to
promote deviant behavior) through various electronic devices.
Monitor children’s
behavior for signs of cyberbullying:
- Has the child changed their eating and sleeping patterns?
- Has the child's grades dropped?
- Has the child's friendships and social interactions changed?
Parents need to keep avenues of communication open and encourage conversations about cyberbullying. It is unrealistic to think we can monitor or “lock up” all devices and access points. Communication and awareness is a much more appropriate approach, and the dialogue should start as soon as your child begins using the internet.
Monitor children’s
social media activity:
Many parents demand to
know the passwords and user names of their children’s social media accounts and
then monitor the accounts. These parents also block users and may contact law
enforcement for inappropriate communications. A step further is switching media service providers. Some providers
have over 25 channels tailored for children and you can add parental controls
to monitor your children's media habits, so your children aren't exposed to
inappropriate material that may encourage bullying.
There are now laws against bullying
in 49 states. Sixteen states have added cyberbullying to
their anti-bullying laws.
Written by Diane Flanagan
& Anthony Gonzalez
Edited by Anthony Gonzalez for Child Quest International
Edited by Anthony Gonzalez for Child Quest International
Labels:
cyberbullying,
emotional damage,
Internet safety,
parenting
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